An Office Affair Will Get You Places!

I'm kinda lazy to blog this whole month, not sure why. Just not in the mood to express everything that is going on around me. I was feeling really down lately, especially after my appraisal this quarter. I know i will definitely will not achieve a good rating even at the end of this year if i don't transfer to another team. I hate my Team at Scope International!

Last year my rating was really bad. And it really reflects on my bonus which i am furious inside. I was the committee member of my current department, Treasurer to be exact. But my close friends and family knows that i spend most of my weekends at home doing all the crap for my company decoration competition for any occasion as i remember. I was also the committee member for my team (EDC HK). We organize the trip to Genting and some other gatherings (mostly makan-makan)

I'm not trying to brag on what i did for the company, i like what i do. But i am frustrated that my effort and participation are not reflected on ratings last year and that my contributions are not appreciated. I remember 2 years before when i just join the company, i was told to me more active in events and to take part, to organize evens in order to have god ratings. So, i did. I did whatever my 2 hands can do and i get nothing but shit for my appraisal.

We are measured in 5 aspects. Trustworthy, International, Creative, Courageous and Responsive. We try to live up to the 5 ridiculous measures that are installed for us for each different rankings in the company. To my experience, even if you fulfill most of the 5 'elements' said above. They will never take it into account. My work and contribution for the company and the team, was not taken into account. I was really frustrated, i was told to do perform something but was measured otherwise. In spite of getting good ratings as i was clearly suppose to, i got a rating that is far more worst then i initially join from my previous team and done nothing to contribute to any event.

This proves that if i sit my big fat ass down on my chair confine to my cubicle, just merely coming to work and finish my work and get my big fat ass home. I might get a good rating :) So, this year, i have made up my mind to not to participate in any events or outings. I feel it is a waste of my precious time especially during the weekends. I rather spend it at home watching TV or blogging, hang out with my friends and spend time with my family than attending to any stupid company function that i was told that will boost up my ratings.

In my humble opinion, the so-called objectives they try to measure us with, really contradicts everything that they force us to live up to. All you get is, 'aiya...this one cannot consider as an objective la' this one la..not job related la, cannot consider' 'this one did not improve in our productivity in any aspect la'. So, in the end of the day. Mostly what we have written in our appraisal is null and void. I was like, what the fuck!!!??!! Why the hell host so many events and tell us it is compulsory to attend? Why make us write our own appraisal when most of it 'will not be considered'? You know what i do now? Hand in empty appraisals. I don't feel the need to justify anything that i do now, because it will not be taken into account.

There is so many favouritism going on in my team, which at this point is really frustrating. One this that really annoys me is that my boss ask me to improve on my MC rate. I was really flabbergasted when he made this remark. He compared me to another colleague that used to have the highest rate of MC in our team. So far at this quarter i have taken the most MC. I mean come on!!! He could have at least told me to take a good care of my health! The seniors have taken a lot more MC but have not been approached. Why?? Because he was too afraid to confront them, so he will pick on the newbies. Because with us, he can control and vent out his dissatisfaction that he could not do with the seniors.

How in the hell i can do to 'improve' my MC rate? I definitely can refuse to take MC, but why the hell i should jepordise my health for the company that clearly does not care about their employee's welfare? I have to drive all the way from Klang to work at KL, what if something happen to me on my way to work? Well, i don't think anyone will feel bad if anything happen to me. All they can do is replace me. Yes, i won't be that naive to risk my life for i am only just a number or a name in that company. Anyone is replacable. They won't be like 'ohh..poor Melissa is sick, she should rest at home and recuperate sooner'.

All i am saying, it is really unfair to rate a person based on how many sick leave they take. Furthermore, he clearly knows that i am really sick. one, because when i was about to get sick, before all the bacteria kicked in. I still go to work, i was sneezing and coughing and had mild fever. I still go to work, but i was disoriented and my concentration level had decrease termendously. That is why i made a lot of mistake for that period of time, which is why it is better for me to stay home and recover. I owuldn't want to make a big blunder while i was sick at work, because in the end, it will reflect to me.

I don't think they will be kind enough to consider that i was sick and still come to work. They won't see that you are dedicated. All they see is the mistake you make. If you are sick and don't come to work, they say you are lazy and not commited to your job. When you come to work, and accidently made a mistake while you are sick, they say you are not responsible and careless. So, what the fucking hell they want you to do!!

I am not saying that i can be easily walked over by my boss. I don't want to make a big issue out of it because in any way it will not help me in any situation. I can't be compared to the seniors of 8 years experience and me with only 2 years experience. When my boss a terrible rating, obviously from his own team. He was frustrated at us, saying that he has backed us up in so many ways that this is what he gets. I mean 'Hello'??? What back up? By giving us terrible ratings?? That's a good one!! STOP blaming us and really look into what you have done for us lately!! STOP pointing fingers and really sit down and ponder!

My conclusion, in order to have good ratings. To act cute and innocent with your immediate boss, make sure you give him a good head (be sure to be really good at it), what else? Go to bed with him! I'm sure you will get exceptionally good ratings. Even if you have made a mistake it will be covered, he will rather take the blame for you. Even if you are clearly wrong, he will make every excuse to prove that you are right in a very wrong way. Even if you want to go back in the middle of the day because you are stress, you can do so with no objection. Even if you want to take MC, it will not be recorded. furthermore, you can take MC and later admits that you actually go to the movies will not get into trouble!